Zuzu's Petals

Quiet seems to pervade the library, hugging the corners of the stacks, sweeping down the stairs in the atrium, and collecting in tiny piles on the carpet. The only reason I know it's inhabited is the fact that I am still sitting at my desk, on the first floor, in Special Collections, with a few other student employees who pass by here and there. There's not much to do; I've finished my project, pandora just informed me that our computer has used up its 40 hour limit for music, and I've resorted to looking at old pictures on facebook.

As I've clicked through the hundreds of pictures of me and my loved ones, I can't help but smile at all the crazy things I've done. Christmas pictures of us gallivanting around Disneyland, Derek and I building a snowman at 3 in the morning, pictures of me standing beneath Big Ben. All of these are fabulous memories, of course, but I often wonder where the "real life" is in these snapshots. Where are the days when all I did was curl up with Harry Potter and read it from cover to cover? Where's the sandbox I spend hours, even days, in? Where are the breakfasts in our pajamas, or Derek and I curling up to watch a movie on the laptop? I guess the sad thing is, these pictures all depict the big bang moments. But reality is that life is a gradual creation, a collection of moments that turn us into people.

I couldn't help but be reminded of Russell in Disney's movie UP. He said, "Sometimes, it's the boring stuff I remember the most." And I have to agree with him! It's the "boring" stuff that make us who we are, that connect us to our loved ones. I mean, how would Sam have been my best friend until just about forever if we hadn't jumped on our beds all night? Why would I want to go home if I didn't have a million and one nights of eating dinner together to bring me back to my family? How on earth could I have made it for two years without hearing Derek's voice if I didn't have hours spend on my apartment love seat, talking about what type of furniture or Tupperware we would be? Sure, you might look at all that and say: that's really boring. And perhaps it is. But let me remind you of something.

In It's A Wonderful Life George Bailey is given the incredible opportunity of seeing what the world would be like without him. In the end, when George "lives again," the first thing he wants is confirmation and what does he look for? A few petals from his daughter's flower: "Zuzu's petals." That small simple thing brought a huge smile to his face, laughter, and enough energy to run home through the snow of Bedford Falls. Those seemingly insignificant petals were confirmation that his wife and children lived, that they loved him, and that they wanted him home.

I can't help but think that it truly is the "small and simple things" which bring great moments and great love to our lives. And I'm grateful for all of them. I think back on all the moments of barbies and mermaids in the pool and realize that without all of that, my sisters and brother would just be human beings to me. Sure, I would still see their worth, but how much of it would I see? A surface of paint, not the layers and layers that make them who they are.Thank goodness for Zuzu's Petals.